Past tense

I have trouble referring to Collin in the past tense.

Although my brain understands that I will not see Collin again on this side of Heaven, my heart refuses to accept it.  I. miss. my. son.  I want to see him again.  Sooner rather than later.  I mean today.  This minute.  Now.  And it hurts my heart to be separated from him.

I have trouble referring to Collin in the past tense.  Because he's very much a part of my present.  And I believe he will be a big part of my future.

But, what it really boils down to is that I believe in eternity.  Eternal life.  And I believe that Collin is living out his life in eternity with Jesus in Heaven right now.  So Collin, the little person that I love so dearly, still exists.  He still is.  He is not just past, but present and future too.

So...

Collin Walker - Mommy loves you.  Daddy loves you, baby.  Always.  I'm looking forward to seeing you again.